My Great Epic! Metal Gear Solaris

Hey people!

Solid Snake here and boy, I've got an epic for you!

I just got the idea at school, so this is the beginning *drum roll*...

OK, so here goes...

YEAR 2021, Shadow Moses Island

(This is in the mind of a genome soldier, the basic fighting unit in our villain's armada)

Genome Soldier Unit Memory Bank

Processing...

Briefing: Armed Mercenary, Master of Stealth on the base. Capture him, alive or DEAD.

Location: Docks, Shadow Moses

Processing...

Sudden Eruption of Decibel Tones!

Processing...Footsteps....

Target Direction...North, 10 steps....

East...8 steps...

North East...3 Steps....

South...6.5 steps...!

Wrong Parameter....does not compute....does not compute...?

CRACK!

Injuries Sustained...Broken Neck...

Death sequence in 3.61 seconds...

2.01 seconds...

0.45 seconds...

DEATH...

Mission Failed...

Repeat Command...

Fission Mailed...

zzzssstttttt..........

Target Identified....Solid Snake.........

zzzzzsssssstttttttt.......................

BOOM!

"Kept you waiting, huh? Yeah it's me, Solid Snake..."

Well, if you ask as to how Solid Snake got the better of that Genome Soldier...You won't believe it, but, Solid Snake is a master of Stealth...expert in Close Quarters Combat and many other Martial Arts, wielder of all guns, from the simple to the fancy...and a lot more. He has undergone greater missions, but, he is armed with nothing but a SO-com (Special Operatives Communicator) and a packet of chips. A PACKET OF CHIPS?! OK, but, everyone's dead against them, but still, the LEGENDARY Solid Snake carries them...We'll see why...

Location: SHADOW MOSES...

(SO-com Call)

Snake: This is Snake...I've reached.

Revolver Bond: Good job Snake...

White Bone: Cool!

Snake: OK, but these Genome soldiers are so retarded...

Bond: That's because they are just infantry, they do not have a damn about you...

Bone: Yeah, they're sore losers...Anyway, how's the new Stealth Suit working out?

Snake: Yeah...good...

Bond: Listen Snake... The whole island is intent on getting you. You have to find Sniper Wolf and Anaconda quickly...

Snake: What about that Psycho Mantis?

Mantis: That's UNICORN Mantis, you dummy!

Snake: Whew...one soul less to save...

Bond: OK, So you'd better, go to the cell where they are being held. Remember to switch to burst transmission when I tell you.

Snake: Got it.

Bone: Snake, whatever you do, be careful. There's an MP 5 SD in the docks itself. Find it and use it.

Snake: Right.

"So I'm ready." thought Snake. Right. Now, we're sizzling...

Pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaasssssseeeeeeee comment. Please?